Building bonds of love is hard work

YouthInk writers give their take on the importance of family.

When simple acts are best

THE cynic in me feels that the Singapore Family Day is yet another attempt to create and commercialise a pseudo-occasion.

Every day can be Family Day, be it a simple meal or outing together. Why do we need free attraction passes to bond with one another?

In an age of mobility, independence and time pressure, it is heartening to see family members make the effort – more now than ever before – to reach out to one another.

I have a friend who attends hip-hop dance classes with her mother. Talk about having a cool mum.

It could be your grandparents trying to pick up simple English words (peppered with dialect) to communicate better with you, or your parent adding you as a ‘friend’ on social networking website Facebook.

It is endearing to see how the elder generation embraces new trends to connect with the young.

As youth, we can make an effort to bond with our elders too, be it grocery shopping or observing festive customs – even if we are clueless about why we have to do it.

Such acts, though small, are more important now than ever before in keeping the family together.

Chew Zhi Wen, 21, has a place to read law and economics at the National University of Singapore

Family gathering? Any excuse will do

THERE are two types of family gatherings: One where relations turn up because they are obliged to; and the other where they genuinely want to show up.

Fortunately, the get-togethers in my family belong to the latter category. We often make the slightest excuse to meet.

‘Uncle collected his CPF, let’s celebrate!’ or ‘There’s a new restaurant, let’s check it out!’

The result: Gatherings are enjoyable rather than monotonous, family support is readily available (last-minute baby-sitters, anyone?) and inter-generational bonds are strong.

Before my brother enlisted in the army, my family gathered for dinner where the men eagerly dished out advice and reminisced about their own experiences.

Their advice helped clear my brother’s initial apprehension.

Building family ties is like nurturing friendships.

Family members must want to take time and effort to forge bonds.

Shermaine Wong, 22, is a final-year communication studies student at the Nanyang Technological University

Don’t have deathbed regrets

MANY of my peers do not place much significance on family-related festivals, much less celebrate them.

Oft-cited reasons include an alienation from traditional culture and the general modernisation of family attitudes – it’s not cool to be homey.

From my experience though, I believe the root cause of this apathy comes from the amount of time Singaporeans spend away from home.

It simply leaves too little time to invest in the family unit.

We may all be guilty of this to some extent, whether child or parent. It’s time we dug deep into our minds to address our priorities.

Think of it this way: On our deathbeds, we are more likely to regret not having spent enough time with our loved ones than at work or at school.

Navin Singh Dhillon, 18, is a second-year student at the Millennia Institute

Explore posts in the same categories: My Life

Tags: Chew Zhi Wen, Navin Singh Dhillon, Shermaine Wong

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